Matthew’s story about Joseph’s dream of divine assurance in taking
Mary as his wife (Mt. 1:20) might not have seemed unusual to the ancient
Israelites. For, the established view back
then was that dreams are a common means of divine communication. Not so obvious in the story, however, is a contradiction
of values that Joseph faced as did many of his contemporaries. This contradiction is one that we too often
face in our own lives today. By story’s
end, Joseph resolves the contradiction in a way that offers hope not only for the
ancient Israelites, but for us as well.
The contradiction begins with
Joseph’s awareness that Mary is pregnant.
How Joseph becomes aware of this the story does not reveal, but his
awareness gives rise to a contradiction of values. On the one hand, because Joseph is a
righteous man, he wants to keep his promises, especially his promise to Mary.
But, her apparent infidelity is a source of shame and insult to his honor and
reputation, not to mention the shame for Mary and dishonor it brings to her as
well. Mary’s apparent infidelity also subjects
her to public scorn and perhaps even death by stoning as prescribed by Mosaic
Law. Because he is an honorable man,
Joseph finds a way out that saves both from such a dreadful fate.
The way out Joseph initially chooses is for him to do the most
acceptable and expected thing. Joseph
decides to quietly divorce Mary. Rather
than go against the grain of public opinion and risk religious condemnation, Joseph
decides to release Mary from her obligation to marry him. This is the honorable and acceptable thing to
do. Not mentioned in the story, however,
is the obvious fear factor that also motivates Joseph’s decision. Joseph too would have faced the same public
scorn and religious condemnation that Mary faced, although for different
reasons. And, this potential for ridicule,
rejection and religious condemnation would cause fear in any rational person,
and such fear is thus an added factor in Joseph’s initial choice.
Before he carries out his decision to divorce Mary, however,
lo and behold, an angel of the Lord appears to Joseph in a dream and reassures
him about his original marriage plans. Although
he surely cannot foresee the full consequences of doing as the angel tells him,
Joseph follows the inspiration of the Lord and sets aside his fear. He responds to the angel’s message with total
trust and confidence in the Lord. He goes
against the grain of public opinion and does the right thing. The good outcome and benefit for humankind because of Joseph’s trust in the Lord has been told and retold for centuries.
What happens to Joseph in this situation highlights a similar
conflict of values that we too often face in our own lives. On the one hand, we pride ourselves on our independence
and self-reliance. We place great value
on our freedom of choice and on being masters of our own fate. We like the view of ourselves as independent
thinkers who are willing to go against the grain of public opinion when
necessary and do the right thing.
Yet, despite the value we place on our independence, the
paradox is that we are also a fearful people.
Our fear is so deep that we protect ourselves by rejecting, shunning,
ostracizing, ridiculing and condemning that which is different from us—any
person, any movement, any political, religious, or civil organization or idea that
does not fit the mainstream. In other
words, we tend to fear anything people think of as unacceptable, shameful, and
opposed to common ways of thinking.
The differences that we reject and shun often include people
of a different race or nationality, have a strange color of hair, wear peculiar
clothes, hold views at odds with our own, have a different political
association or different set of religious beliefs. We often find ourselves rejecting and marginalizing
those who choose a marital partner we find unacceptable, live in neighborhoods
we don’t like, have jobs seen as demeaning, or those with little money or
social status, and the list goes on. In
short, on the one hand, we value our freedom of choice and unique standing, and
on the other hand, we are very much afraid of being different, of going against
the grain of public opinion. This
contradiction of values and the underlying fear that often motivates our
response is what the dream of Joseph is all about.
For that reason, the way in which Joseph ultimately resolves this
conflict provides a message of hope and guidance for us. Although Joseph’s first response is to let
public opinion motivate his choice to divorce Mary, ultimately Joseph puts his total
trust in the Lord and does what he knows in his gut is the right thing. Whether he literally received that
inspiration from an angel does not matter. What matters is that Joseph had a
conflict of values that he resolved by placing his trust in the Lord and following
the Lord’s inspiration in making his choice.
We can do the same. We
can hand ourselves over to the Holy Spirit.
We can place our trust in the Lord and allow him to inspire our choices,
especially those that are difficult. And
like Joseph, we can be sure of the outcome because his dream and resolution
echo the ancient proverb, “Trust in the Lord in all things” (Prov 3:5). For, we know that the Lord works all things
to the good for those who love him (Rm 8:28).
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